You know, I'm not a crabby dog. That's not who I am; however, I do enjoy attention, especially during my family morning chit chats.

Now to my dilemma. After breakfast, we sit in the living room and enjoy a second cup of coffee and read the paper sharing news or discussing something on TV. And what am I doing? Nothing. They just ignore me. And I can't understand half of what they're saying especially when words like "ingenious" or "ubiquitous" pop up. Who are they trying to impress?

After listening to this nonsense, for what seemed like forever, I decided to take matters into my own hands. Mentally I jotted down the word, "oxymoron." Despite my limited stash of words, I'll give it a try. Now, let me see!

One summer while staying in a cabin at Bison Ranch, Arizona, fenced in front of the main lodge, were a herd of strange-looking huge, cross creatures called bisons.

They looked just like big ugly oxen only bigger.

Every day, when I was taken for my walk, we would pass their corral. I'd bark and bark, run the fence back and forth trying to get noticed or at least spark out a grunt or two. Talk about being ignored. Well, I finally decided that they all were morons, and I had the smarts compared to that herd. Get it, morons or in other words if you break that word into two parts it spells "ox moron" or "dumb ox."

What a relief. Now I want my dinner. Can you hear me barking? That means "I want my food NOW." And they call me "pedantic." I'm not fooled one bit. That means "ped antic" or "foolish feet." How easy is that?

Looking forward to our chats in the halls!
Love, P.D.

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